Welcome to Mass, Blog Around The World Peeps!

***The contest is over, but thanks for stopping by!***

My name is Alicia, and I will be your tour guide.

Wicked nice to meet you!

If you're a regular around here, may I introduce the visitors from Blog Around The World. Regulars, if you don't already know what BATW is, go check it out! I'll be here when you get back. Promise.

I was born in Boston and though I have since moved out to the land of lawns and lawnmowers, Ma and Dad are still in the city.

Despite my good Boston upbringing, I dared to marry a Jersey boy who is also - gasp - a Yankees fan.

Not only did I bring shame to my people, I also became a terrible influence on my youngest sister who recently got hitched to an Up-stater (NY).

Thankfully, they are both wonderful men, so we forgive them that whole pinstripes and bad judgement thing. Supplying the 'rents with a fabulous grandson didn't hurt either!

So as the landing place of The Mayflower, Massachusetts is naturally a state of firsts.

The first subway - the T.

Photo Credit

The first public school - Boston Latin School.

SUMUS PRIMI! GO WOLFPACK!
(guess where I went to high school?)
Photo Credit

The first public park - The Boston Commons.

Photo Credit

The first Dunkin Donuts - in Quincy.Photo Credit


Even the first zip code in the whole US - 01001 in Agawam, MA.
(But then - I'm a little partial to zip codes!)Photo Credit


As fascinating as all that is, most people only want to know two things about Mass.

1. Do we really all sound like Mayor Quimby?

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And

2. Do I know the New Kids On The Block?

Photo Credit

No, and sadly, no. Though I did grow up in the zip code immediately adjoining one of them, and, bloggy confession time - stood outside one of their houses with a friend only to get the Dad's autograph instead.

Mr. Wood was quite lovely.

As you all will be spending the day in my fair state, I thought I'd give you a primer to help you get around under the radar, so to speak.

Contrary to popular belief, we do not only have 25 letters in our alphabet.

We have 26. One of them just happens to be "Ah." To illustrate: car = cah, water = watah.

It is widely believed that all people from Mass not only drop their Rs, but subsequently add them where they do not belong.

For example: Pizza = pizzer. This is only true of certain towns, however, mostly to the west of Boston proper.

We are also quite set in our ways when it comes to our vocabulary.

Soda is a carbonized drink. Bubblers are water fountains. Jimmies are the multi-colored toppings commonly found on ice cream cones.

For travel within the Boston City limits, it is vital to understand the relationship between the proper name of the location you wish to get to, and the local translation of that name.

A general rule of thumb is to either add "ie" to the name or bluntly abbreviate it. Following this rule, South Boston becomes Southie and Dorchester becomes Dot.

And just in case you don't follow New England sports, you should know that Fenway Park is a perfectly acceptable choice for a house of worship.

You say Amazing Grace, I say Sweet Caroline. Live and let live, right?

When in doubt, to emphasize the importance of either a statement or a request: Wicked.

Ok, so let's put it together, shall we?

Let's say you wanted to say the following:

Fitzwilliam, would it be possible to borrow your aunt's Cadillac? I would like to visit the liquor store to acquire additional tonic water for our beach party tonight.

Sure, Sullivan, Unfortunately you will have to drive as I have recently fallen down and injured my ankle.

Oh, my! Really?

Indeed.

Here's how it should sound:

Hey, Fitzy! Can we take yah Ahnt's Caddy? I need to hit the packie for some sodah for the keggah up Castle Island.

Yeah, Sully, but it's all you onna-counah I totally took a diggah and messed up my foot.

Nuh-uh!

Wicked pissah!

***

Please note: for maximum authenticity, the speaker should be wearing at least one article of Red Sox logoed clothing. We will also accept a collegiate baseball cap - preferably well worn and folded at the brim in a downward U-shape - from any of the fine institutions in either Maine or New Hampshire. Wearing a sweatshirt with "Harvard" on it will result in an automatic disqualification and expulsion from the state. If you are still confused, may I direct your attention to The Wicked Good Guide To Boston English.

I hope you will enjoy your trip through the Bay State today. As a token of hospitality, I will be giving a little something away.

No, not a 2008 Red Sox ALCS shirt!

How about this?

These lovelies are handmade with copper and freshwater pearls, and can be yours with the click of a mouse! Just leave a comment on this post, and don't forget to tell me what state you're from. I will close the comments at midnight on Thursday so everyone will have time to get in on the giveaway goodness.

Thank you all for stopping by!

It was

WICKED AWESOME!

(Please note: all photos, save the earrings, were obtained through Yahoo Images and are accompanied by their originating URL as "Photo Credit.")